@TwinSurvivalist: After significant research, I can confirm that toddlers will not go away if you ignore them.
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@ScottLinnen: We have a ghost. Came home and found the fridge magnets rearranged: "I see dreadful people."
@KamaroPayne: Do you ever take a bunch of pills, forget that you took a bunch of pills, take a bunch more pills, and then die? I know. Me TOO.
@TEXASVETERAN: I just swallowed my record player's needle and nothing's happened to me, nothing's happened to me, nothing's happened to me, nothing's happe
@Soren_Ltd: Sex with me is like a ferris wheel: slower than you hoped, full of clunky stops and a carny watches to make sure you don't get off.