@LindaInDisguise: After sitting in the labor and delivery waiting room chairs for 12 hours, I need an epidural as much as those women in labor do.
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@trevso_electric: When two girls hate each other, they say "we should DEFINITELY hang out" and then take turns shouting "definitely!" until one of them dies.
@stephenjmolloy: *first day as a lawyer* Bailiff: All rise for the judge. Me: *too lazy* Objection.
@CherBear162: I can't believe the pharmacy hasn't called! "Oh they did..3 or 4 days ago..I forgot to tell you. What's it's for anyway?" Anxiety.