@Jazzzzzmina: After watching Honey Boo Boo, I realize America has much bigger problems than the national debt.
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@ClichedOut: Bailiff: Do you swear to tell the whole truth, so help you God? Me: Yes, unless she asks me if she looks fat.
@samalmightysam: I don't know why Coca-Cola and Pepsi are fighting over what Santa drinks, everybody knows that big fat belly can only come from beers.
@tastefactory: 12 YEAR OLD: I wrote a movie script called Suicide Squad but it's bad *throws in trash* HOLLYWOOD PRODUCER: *walks by trash* Hey what's this