@just1fool: After years of failure, the "scientist" that had been trying to create a fake urine nearly went mad after he drank his first Miller Lite.
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@copymama: I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.
@Ideal_Victoria: Ok, seriously men... You can't hear yourselves snoring, but the slightest crinkle of a chip bag, and you're suddenly wide awake?!
@tchrquotes: Me [seeing they want to give teachers guns because there are guns in schools]: There are also drugs in schools.
@Bagyants: It's convenient for my password security needs that my mother's maiden name is Waffles4%