@BarebakAssassin: After you're done looking for true love on Twitter, you should go ride a unicorn around Atlantis, then eat some heart-healthy ice cream.
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@garrettbarry70: Super excited about staying at my daughter's place so I can eat her cereal and leave the empty box in her cupboard.
@KeetPotato: *gives gf a small gift wrapped box* "aww what's this, youre so sweet" *opens it* "wait, is this my toothbrush?" YOU DONT LIVE HERE KAREN
@Death_Buddy: *gets down to snails level* IF YOU JUST TELL ME WHERE YOU'RE TRYING TO GET TO THEN I CAN HELP YOU GET THERE FASTER.