@jaslakhmna: Alcohol because no great conversation ever started over a salad !
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@MoneypennyNaked: [starts Power Point presentation titled "Why I'm Breaking Up With You"] Him: Wait, what the--? Me: Please hold all questions until the end.
@NicestHippo: BEAR JUDGE: Counsel, this is your last warning, you cannot-- LAWYER: *plays dead* BEAR JUDGE: Where did he go
@TheTweetOfGod: "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. Unless they're darker than, say, beige."- Statue of Liberty.
@Lord_Voldemort7: Taylor Swift's ex-boyfriends should band together to create a compilation album entitled "Maybe it's not us, it's you..."