@web_supergirl: Alcohol is claiming me as a dependent on his taxes this year.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jordan_stratton: RRH: Grandma, what big eyes you have. And what big ears you have. And what big TEETH you have! Grandma: You're my least favorite grandchild
@HeyZeus666: I don't suffer insomnia like most tweeters do. I always get a solid 7, maybe 8 minutes of sleep every night.
@CheetohFace: The Westboro Baptist Church is planning on picketing Fred Phelps funeral. I'm not sure they even know what they're doing anymore, you guys.