@bombsydoll: Aliens scoop me up & put me in a big glass jar w holes poked in the lid. They scatter Pringles inside to simulate my natural environment.
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@GrowlyGrego: It's like my racist grandpa used to say: "Good morning." That unrepentant bigot had many flaws, but cordial salutations wasn't one of them.
@ChristianPlante: Your perfume/cologne should reward someone for getting close, not punish them for being in the same building.
@PaulyPeligroso: If you put on BBC news and told me it was Downton Abbey, I'd watch for like 20 min before I asked "For real, tho?"