@TheBoydP: All I'm saying is if you really want someone to dance with you, you probably shouldn't tell them to shut up.
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@StoferComic: An argument with my wife is like the gas pedal on a Prius. I can put my foot down, but I don't really expect much to happen...
@Tommytoughstuff: [Bank robbery] *Other robbers jump into getaway van* "DRIVE! DRIVE! DRIVE!" "Okie dokie." * Starts to adjust mirrors*
@AristotlesNZ: OH GOD! BOB IS HAVING A HEART ATTACK! QUICK SOMEONE CALL A TEMP AGENCY. I'M SURE AS HELL NOT DOING ALL HIS WORK.
@KeetPotato: cop: "sir im afraid your dog is too cool for this neighbourhood" me: [turns his little baseball cap round right way] cop: "ok that's better"