@JonasPolsky: All in favor of imitating Spanish women say "Aye-yi-yi."
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@Parker_Simpson: The guy who coined the phrase,"I'm not gettin any younger." The guy he said it to then coined the phrase,"No shit, Sherlock."
@JermHimselfish: It's amazing how eating such a small amount of dog food can cause such a large amount of concern from the people at the pet store.
@Hobo_Splendido: Apparently the maximum number of times you can keep getting back in line for Communion wafers is 4.
@weinerdog4life: The first thing you'll need if you're planning on stealing an ostrich from the zoo is a car with a sunroof