@ericonederful: All of the good tweets are either married or gay.
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@jessokfine: I learned all my flirting from lizards so I just do a bunch of really fast pushups when I see a cute lizard.
@UncleDuke1969: "If you don't let the Jews go, I will find you. I will kill you." Liam Neeson returns in... TAKEN 3: SCHINDLER'S PISSED (Summer 2015)
@NoticablyBacon: Accidentally just told a girl that "she has a nice head" because I appearently have the flirting skills of a serial killer