@heymonroe: All of these time capsules I just dug up have bodies in them?
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@sock_holliday: 'Winter Wonderland' is my favourite song about building a snowman that you will potentially have sex with later
@Eightinchgoat: Guide to DIY: 1. Double the cost estimate. 2. Double the time it should take. 3. Live with it for 3 months 4. Hire someone to fix it.
@sofarrsogud: #MarriedPeopleIssues You hang up.. No, you hang up... You hang up.... Noooo, you hang up. They're your clothes. I'm not your maid.