@RaynaTheGreat: All of your inspirational tweets make me want to track you down and pee on something you love.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AminaMarx: update: the light went out in my fridge so i had to eat everything so it wouldn't get scared
@ArfMeasures: [customs] "Passport?" *I lift up my bag & a severed head falls out* ME: OH NO OH GOD *still rummaging through bag* ME: I've forgotten it
@ElleOhHell: Many English names are derived from occupations, like Fletcher (arrow maker), Cooper (barrel maker), or Cunningham (tricky pig).
@ZGhaoN: Whale: Hey did you hear I have a new girlfriend? She's aaall over me it's crazy. Eel: For the last time barnacles don't count as girlfriends