@conanobrienswyf: All out of clean spoons so I guess I'll just eat this fat free yogurt with my gun.
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@qqnqui: Skipped the gym today to go to McDonald's. The bus did not come back, so I had to walk 2 miles home. Well played, universe.
@iAmDelFreaky: Me: Take my pic *hands him camera & giggles* Him: What's funny? Me: Nothing. Him: *presses button, explodes, dies* Me: Ha! Photo bombed!