@MarkAgee: All this "Kaine is boring" talk is your reminder that nowadays Abraham Lincoln would have to know parkour or some shit
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@IvoryGazelle: Well, actually, FBI is not an acronym; it's an initialism, because you can't pronounce it as a word. Mom: This is why you have no friends.
@ramblinma: I accidentally told my kid I paid for a toy "that Santa brought" and now I'm stuck in an elaborate web of lies please send help.
@WilliamAder: Shutdown Apocalypse Update: GPS is down. Using a refrigerator magnet as a compass. I think it's just pointing to another refrigerator.
@Marlebean: That's great about your engagement, promotion and new car. I grabbed the EXACT amount of hangers I needed to put away laundry. Samsies!