@michaelianblack: All those guys who refuse to marry their girlfriends until everybody has the right to marry must be shitting their pants.
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@TheAlexNevil: "In just 4 years, you can get a 4 year degree!" Yes, "university" commercial--that math checks out.
@barbhaynes: OMG, you guys, there's a button on this stove that says "Stop Time". Should I press it??
@RalstonReports: Good news, everyone. I was robbed last night. But I confronted the robber and he agreed to set up a joint robbery task force with me.