@Cheeseboy22: All those years of getting horrible elementary school pictures was just society's way of preparing you for your driver's license photo.
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@Playing_Dad: Me: You want to watch a horror movie for Halloween? Dog: Sure, put it on Me: *turns on Dyson vacuum infomercial*
@philyuck: I just told my dog to "say hi" to another dog. And yes, I realize that's crazy; this chihuahua obviously only speaks Spanish.
@Mr57percent: The older I get, the more I feel like the town elders in Footloose were actually pretty cool.
@Tommytoughstuff: ME: This electric toothbrush knocked a few of my teeth loose. DENTIST: That's an egg beater.