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@dance_blessed: "All you need is love."
@robdelaney: Trump University is getting a bad rap. My nephew went there and he can poop in a toilet AND say the N-word.
@mallelis: ovens are insane
"oh thats just my box of invisible fire i heat dead things in"
@Ham_Tornado: New children's book I'm working on: "Nobody poops but you, you disgusting little freak".
@ProdigyNelson: "WHAT DO WE WANT?"
"A BETTER STRUCTURE FOR MEASUREMENT OF TIME THAT ISN'T AN ILLUSION CREATED BY MAN"
"WHEN DO WE WANT IT?"
@SoVeryBritish: Trains delayed due to:
- Wrong kind of sun
- Ominous cloud
- Slightly damp leaf
- Chilly track
- Suspicious gravel
- Sarcastic swan