@Cheeseboy22: Alright, time for a Twitter spelling bee! First word: "their", meaning "belongs to them." Alright, that only leaves 14 of you left standing.
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@CelebrityChez: How to make pasta: -Boil water. -Put what you think couldn't possibly be too much pasta in the pot. -Wrong. -Start an Italian restaurant.
@Fred_Delicious: [Girlfriend looks at me in disgust] "Did u just propose using emojis?" ... "Technically its called a propoji, but yes" [She's already gone]