@RainbowJohnJ: Always a housemaid, never a house.
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@ComedicBust: [About to have sex] Me: I want you so bad. Her: Take me. Me: [rips off panties] Her: WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING PANTIES
@mollzbenn: I brought a hot glue gun to the gun range and it was awkward at first, but now we've created so many memories.
@AndyAsAdjective: Does the employee manual say I CAN'T set up my camping tent inside my cubicle? No? Then please step outside & zip the door up behind you.