@meganamram: Always a metermaid never a meter
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@BillCorbett: Deranged Extremist 1: We'll drown 100 kittens. Deranged Extremist 2: We won't drown ANY kittens. Cool Centist: We'll drown 50 kittens.
@Tuna_Lover: I took my turtle for a walk. It's been six months and we are finally at the end of my driveway.
@sixfootcandy: [date] Him: So where are you from? Me: According to my parents, I was born in a barn.
@Sir_Strange: I almost died today, so naturally my first impulse was to pull my phone out and tweet about it.