@ScottLinnen: Always keep an axe by the front door so I can give the other Jehovah something awesome to witness.
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@pleatedjeans: I'll never forget my 8th grade teacher. She was a 12-foot snake monster. Had 4 heads. Ate 7 desks. Killed a kid. Really made an impression.
@mcmullenforus: College is literally the best/worst time of your life. One minute you’re living it up with your friends, the next you have $3.00 and 4 exams
@WilliamRodgers: How to become a Saint 1: Become Catholic 2: Live an exemplary and pious life 3: Perform at least two miracles Or...Just Be Kanye's baby