@TheSnideOne: Always look for the girl with the ponytail holder on her wrist.
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@E_lok44: He asked why I put my stick figures on my dash, not the bumper. I had to explain that it was an actual photo of my relatives.
@SCbchbum: The funniest part about The Bachelor is the participants actually think being married is a prize.
@1Happytwit: I'm not a mechanic so I don't know why, but my car seems to make a screaming noise whenever I run over people.
@iwearaonesie: wife on facebook: homework with 9, he's doing so well! wife to me: it took him 8 tries to spell cake. CAKE. grab some wine on your way home