@MarcusTheToken: Always remember the first move in every fight...punch to the balls.
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@KevinFarzad: Marry someone shorter than you so you can hide all the good snacks on the top shelf.
@DevinRange: I love my 5yr old dearly, but if he keeps saying "Dark" Vader I may have to sell him.
@AristotlesNZ: 9yo: Look what I made! Me: What? 9yo: I taped 2 toilet rolls & made binoculars! Me: Great.*Holds up iPhone* This is what 9yos in China make.
@k_lli: A guy was honking at a car ahead of him to speed up at 6AM so I followed him bc his job must be amazing if he's that excited to get to work.