@richardosman: Am sitting in horrible traffic, but fortunately someone is beeping their horn so we should be on the move soon.
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@hardlyrelevant: "Oh, Monster TRUCK rally. Haha of course..." *Frankenstein slowly backs out of the room, hiding a 24 pack of condoms behind his back*
@RafflesWord: I want cake, to get cake I must get dressed, to get dressed I have to get out of bed, to get out of bed I need cake.
@lovemydogduck: Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger & I realize, Oh my God...I could be eating a slow learner.
@Marlebean: "They say children learn by example, even for potty training." -I explain to my horrified neighbor as my son and dog poop on the lawn