@Laser_Cat: America only considers a war a success if we build a Bed Bath and Beyond in the enemy's capital.
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@AndRyanTF: Incredible Hulk Experiment-Day 13 Just woke up. Still not a Hulk. Looks like I ate all those moldy bagels for nothing. -Research Continues
@ChipKellysBalls: Next time you decide to complain about your problems, just remember, some guy out there has Snooki as his mom ...
@4SLars: PSA: If your kid bumps into me one more time with your shopping cart I will unhinge my jaw and swallow him whole.
@fro_vo: Date: so what do you do Me: i build dog houses Date: oh you're an "arf"itect lol Me: haha good one Date: Me: (under breath) it's "bark"itect