@TheTweetOfGod: America's Got (a very loose definition of what constitutes) Talent.
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@withanewname: Her: *leaving seductively, slowly dragging fingertip across countertop* Mgr: What'd she want? Me: nothing. Mgr: Where're all the donuts?
@Jade_VK: [alarm clock goes off] ok it's happening again it's a day and it's here again *googling* day again why how to unsubscribe days
@FrogAvalanche: [Jesus plays hide-n-seek] Jesus: [exiting cave] Ah, ya found me! Let's play again. Harder this time. Find me now. [He ascends to Heaven]
@Donnie_Fairburn: The scariest room in a haunted house would be filled with people you haven't seen since high school asking what you've been up to these days