@Bob_Janke: An 8 year old just asked me why people in electric cars don't get electrocuted when it rains and now we're checking Google
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@vikkaroni: Job interview HR: What's your best asset? Me: I have an excellent memory. HR: Give me an example. Me: Of what?
@squirrel74wkgn: My wife's fish net stockings are so tight that my legs look like wafer cookies when I take them off.
@Bry_Mac: An interracial couple eating Cheerios and non-English speakers drinking Coke. We're a Benghazi pizza commercial away from a Texas secession.