@noahrobbinsman: An app that makes your phone ring whenever someone asks "so what's next for you"
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@trevso_electric: "If I write something completely creepy under a girl's Facebook photo, maybe it WON'T be creepy if I end it with 'lol.'" -guy logic
@QwertyJones3: I always keep a water spray bottle next to my bed in case a cat burglar breaks in.