@FormerGrunt: An apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ComedicBust: As the house burned down, my wife asked me to grab the photos, but she didn't say our wedding ones. Anyway, here's my dog and I wearing hats
@Laser_Cat: The British are coming! The British are coming! The British have to get up early! The British swear they'll call you in the morning!
@KimmyMonte: *phone rings* "Yeh hi who's this? Sure he's here hold on.. Drastic Measures! Call for u." "Who is it?" "Drastic Times" *crowd goes wild*
@Love_bug1016: Santa read your DMs. The only thing you're getting for Christmas is a prayer group on Facebook.