@kimt205: An egg just followed me. Now I just need some bacon.
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@Nyx422: This bum said everyone who gives him $10 gets a "special" surprise in the alley. My gut says no......but my heart says its a puppy!
@Mama_in_heels: My mom asked where the remote was and my son told her it was up her ass. She high-fived him and then turned around and slapped me.
@JasonBerlin: 1. Bang knee on table - curse life. 2. Check credit card balance. 3. Think back to sweet moment when you banged knee on table.