@kimt205: An egg just followed me. Now I just need some bacon.
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@TheCatWhisprer: The problem with teaching a man to fish is that eventually somebody will microwave that fish in the work break room.
@aligarchy: sorry i'm late, i have terrible time management skills and zero perception of distance as it pertains to speed of travel
@wittwitbarista: Serial killers are updating their check list now for dumping bodies: 1) will this location be discovered by Pokémon players? 2) do I care?
@cogentanalysis: "I want the box where I poop to smell like my poop or else I won't want to poop there. Whoa whoa, not THAT much like my poop! Jesus!" - cats