@_davidlucas_: An egg with 28 followers says I'm not funny. So if you need me, I'll just be in the kitchen making an omelette.
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@Matt_the_1st: It just occurred to me that you could substitute Miranda rights for wedding vows. Verbatim
@Tommytoughstuff: *Pulls gun* Alright give me the money, and don't try anything stupid." *Tries to put a fork in a light socket* "Hey! What did I just say"!?
@_sweet_ham: Sometimes I put my workout gear on and watch tv because it's the thought that counts.