@elonjames: "...and I would've won if it weren't for you meddling minorities, women, gays, young people..." - Mitt Romney #ScoobyDooVillain
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@dreamthievin: Everything I know about sex I learned from Tetris: rotate it and hope it fits in another slot
@WilliamAder: Co-worker playfully snapped my suspenders and now everyone in the office knows my safe word.
@realHamOnWry: I tried S/M once, and ended up with a dominatrix who was unusually cruel. Instead of using a whip she would make me do fractions in my head.
@LackOfShame: 16: I hate old people. Me: That's where you and I are different. 16: You like old people?! Me: No, I hate everybody.