@sixfootcandy: And in conclusion, may I say that black robe is very slimming on you, Your Honor. And I've never seen a bigger gavel.
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@anbrll00: Dr: Your Mom is like regular moms except we lost her in surgery. Me: Did you just use a joke format to tell me my mom died Dr: yep
@hopiecan: how terrible do you think Maria von Trapp's life had to be that she included "doorbells" on her list of favorite things
@Jandalize: There's no way to look cool when the doctor walks into your exam room just as you're blowing up a rubber glove.