@themorris23: And remember kids, when you go to Target, there really is no "non creepy" way to ask where the Vaseline is.
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@ilovepie84: I put a message in a bottle and threw it in the Ocean. The note said "I have Tuberculosis and I coughed in this bottle"
@notalogin: Please help me find my lost pet sloth. It was just right here and, oh, never mind, it's still right here.
@JohnHilsen: Did you know that Mark Zuckerberg and the guy who played the blue Power Ranger are cousins? Just not to each other. But they are cousins.