@jenlaw_11: And satan said "let all the opinions of strangers on social media have an absurdly large effect on you" and it was so
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@ChribHibble: The best thing about alcohol hand gel in hospitals isn't the hygiene, but that everyone walks around like they're hatching a dastardly plan.
@KevinFarzad: FYI guys: If a girl plays w/ her hair while talking to u, it means she has an itchy scalp, possibly lice. Stay away, it is very contagious.
@KyleMcDowell86: If Princess Peach fixed shoes for a living she's be Princess Peach Cobbler lol thanks for following
@IamEnidColeslaw: at my high school reunion everyone kept asking where my date was so I finally told them my dog ate him. no one laughed