@muniraxo: And then Satan whispered, hey let's put the alphabet in math
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@kentgrossarth: The Pope quit. Meteor in Russia. Snowing in Arizona. Star Wars and Star Trek have the same director. Who the hell is playing Jumanji?
@DurtMcHurtt: [funeral] Her: why is my dead grandfather wearing a diamond ring? *sliding it off his finger* Me: *gets down on one knee* because babe...
@Dawn_M_: Show him you care by setting his house on fire so he will have to move in with you and never be lonely again.