@Aspersioncast: Annoy your wife by saying “wow” every time a chick gets out of the limo on The Bachelor.
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@LuvPug: I used to wave my hands in the air like I just don't care, but now I just wave them because I get more steps on my FitBit
@caliluvgirl77: coworker: did you hear someone used all the charity money to buy snacks from the vending machine me: *laughing nervously* that's awful
@JesKeepSwimming: I was going to spend the next 6 years studying medicine to become a doctor. Then I realized I could just like Facebook photos to save lives.