@PJTLynch: Annoying how when you go to the orchestra, there's always that one wasted dude up front swaying and waving his arms around the whole time
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Iwriteforcats: Geppetto: Whew it's a cold one. Pinocchio: Mhmm. G: Fire's running low. P: Mhmm. G: Wonder *sharpens axe* where I could get some wood.
@ElleOhHell: HORSE WEARING EARBUDS: *walks into bar* BARTENDER: Why the long fa-- HORSE: CAN I GET AN APPLETINI?
@MelKassel: Me: *staring into mirror* Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary *skeleton bartender appears and slides me a drink* SB: $8.50, $8.50, $8.50
@kelkulus: Felix Baumgartner's 127,000 ft jump becomes world's greatest free fall, unseating previous record set by the 2008 US Economy. #spacejump