@matt___nelson: Any dog can be a guide dog if you don't care where you're going
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@djdarrellripley: Me: Let's go outside & make love in the rain. Her: What if there's lightning? Me: Then you get to be on top...
@jonnysun: a person who loves cats is not a cat person theyre a dog person who loves cats. a cat person is sombody who is completley apathetic to cats
@TheAlexNevil: Parenting Hack: slide a little cash your kid's teacher's way, & all of his crafts projects will "mysteriously" disappear after being graded.