@sacca: Anyone who says "Let's all put our phones down and talk with each other," is just running out of battery and needs a charge.
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@NouRahif: "Axe" is not going to help you get girls, unless you spray it in their eyes then quickly chloroform them.
@Stuccoman1: The way my dog maintains eye contact while taking a dump is unsettling. Can't he read a magazine like a normal dog?
@david8hughes: [throws a dart at map of the world] One day, I'm gonna go over there & pull that dart out. The next time I wanna play darts, probably.