@mstluvstrinkets: Anything I accomplish before I finish my first cup of coffee has been fueled by rage.
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@TheMichaelRock: My 13yo just dumped his girlfriend and now he's attempting to get his hoodie back. He's in for one hell of a life lesson.
@Cool_Jesse: That's the last time I follow some dude into the woods just because he tells me he's a wizard.
@TheMichaelRock: Coworker: Do you party? Me: Well I do schedule two nights a month that I stay up past 11pm. So yeah.
@itsa_talia: my cat sounds so cute when he sneezes but i really wish he'd stop wasting the coke. it's like goddamn amateur hour with him.