@nikkithecanuck: Anytime I get something stuck in my throat, I use beer. I call this the Heineken maneuver
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@briangaar: Son, that bear is more afraid of you than you are of ... oh wow, that bear is being really brave right now.
@tigersgoroooar: Not to brag, but I just bought Eggland's best eggs from the grocery store. Their BEST eggs. I got them.
@Fred_Delicious: "Members of the jury, how do u find the defendant?" "we... can't find him at all" "DAMMIT THIS IS THE 3RD MURDER WALDO HAS GOTTEN AWAY WITH"