@delusions_of: Anytime I lift my leg higher than 3 inches I yell "KARATE!".
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@stephenjmolloy: Girlfriend: I think we should spend some time apart from each other. Me: Hiatus? Girlfriend: I hate us too.
@HowToBeADad: I was just enviously admiring the energy and flexibility of a 3yo and then he kneed himself in the face.