@RobinMcCauley: AOL was hacked yesterday so watch out for spam email that looks like it came from 1995.
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@ZiddiAkki: Me washing my car Neighbour: Hey what’s up? Washing your car? Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.
@aveuaskew: " I made my famous dip for the office party" You're a regular Abe Lincoln. "But he wasn't a chef" Exactly
@badbanana: "And to my son Ronald, I leave my entire collection of mint-condition, never-been-opened LinkedIn Updates emails."