@FlyoverJoel: Apologizing for canceling a meeting is like saying sorry for buying me a beer.
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@brynnester: [Confession] Me: I wish Jim was alive. He was my best friend Priest: Jim is alive. I saw him yesterday Me: Yeah I was getting to that part
@djdarrellripley: Her: My father is very upset that I'm your girlfriend. Me: Well, duh, I'm very upset that you're my girlfriend...
@gwatts77: Judging by how all of these ladies tweet about cucumbers I'm pretty sure size does matter because I never see them tweeting about carrots :(