@jake_lach: Apparently, if she's refused to speak to you for two days your text should not be 'Why are you mad again?'
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@Ghetto_Trophy: When I'm feeling inadequate, I remember that there are women who marry their prison pen pals, and then my own decisions don't seem so bad.
@teen_news69: LIBERAL PARENTS REFUSE TO GIVE NAUGHTY TEEN COAL: "fossils fuels cause global warming" "billy woke up to solar panels in his stocking"
@jergarl: I wanna join a gang so I can get in a street fight with a rival gang and intimidatingly snap my fingers to a clever song about friendship.
@Rollinintheseat: Interviewer: "Do you consider yourself a punctual person?" Me: "I was born three months premature."