@DirtyySouthMess: Apparently it's not enough to just show up, you need to be wearing pants as well.
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@andylevy: "Guess I'll turn on the news to see what the government is up to" - The President of the United States
@KalvinMacleod: GUY 1: a bee flew in my eye GUY 2: I just ate a bird GUY IN BACK: I can't hear u TOGETHER: there must be a better way NARRATOR: windshields
@Jeffwni: Wife: There's a spider in the kids' bedroom Me: I'll take care of it *raises spider like one of my own* *has a little cry when it graduates*