@runawaycupcake: Apparently just sitting here on my new lawn furniture drinking my Vodka & minding my business is disturbing to other Target guests.
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@VodkaThursday: My bunny thumps at trash collectors. Nice to know that if the Sanitation Dept. ever has ill intentions, she won't stand for any of that shit
@DanMentos: [walks up to guys playing basketball] "mind if I join?" you any good? Hell yeah I'm good. Toss me the orange sphere
@Parentpains: If six years of marriage has taught me anything its that couches are surprisingly comfortable to sleep on.
@therealeatwood: RICE: You think you’re so fancy COUSCOUS: How dare you, commoner! QUINOA: [getting hot stone massage] Can you peasants keep it down?