@Mr_Kapowski: Apparently, occupants aren't 8 legged pants for octopi
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@ZackBornstein: I can't remember a time in my life when an update for Acrobat Reader wasn't available.
@david8hughes: [family game night] Me: do u understand now, grandma? U understand the rules now? Mum [tappin my shoulder]: she gets it. Loosen the headlock
@DanKCharnley: I'm jealous of turtles because if they don't want to talk to someone, they're like "Nah, dude, busy in my shell right now. Come back later."